Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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