I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
