There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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