You made me cry and you don't even care
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
