i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
