I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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