so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
