Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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