grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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