While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
The feeling are messing with the penis
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
