For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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