The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
