The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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