Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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