Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
