I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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