Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
