I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Randomize
