there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
