I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Sorry about my life...
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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