Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
