i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Walk of Shame today included voting.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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