i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
