I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I wish i was in the wii world.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
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Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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