you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
