My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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