Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
