bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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