I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
