I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
