I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
