You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize