Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
