Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
