she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
