Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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