I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
