Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
