What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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