This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize