Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
