I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
