She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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