State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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