Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
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