I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I think my moral compass just broke
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
