We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
