According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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