I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
