Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize