6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
pray to the hookup gods
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
